Wednesday, 24 August 2016

How to Survive London Fashion Week (The Real Deal)

Hey lovelies!

So please forgive me for not posting regularly but I am in a pretty stressful period of my life right now. I'm trying to adjust to the fact that my mother is no longer with me (aside from in spirit) and I'm also moving (yay -__-)!

I thought I'd do a little 'filler' post as London Fashion Week is creeping up on us all and I thought it'd be cute to do a mini rundown of how to survive it as a blogger/attendee and give you a bit of insight into what it's actually like. Before I start, I am in no way bashing LFW... I think it's a wonderful experience to be a part of and I am grateful that I have gone to on-schedule and off-schedule shows (the majority have been off-schedule).

I was telling my friend this the other day but when I was a kid I used to literally sit and watch Fashion TV with my Hello Kitty notepad and rate all the catwalk shows out of 10. I mean seriously... I thought I was Anna Wintour. Anyway, the point I'm alluding to is that I never thought I would actually be able to experience it years down the line. It's quite surreal but there's a lot of chaos and bitchiness that comes with it too believe it or not. If you've been reading my blog for a while you'd know that I keep it all the way 100 on here. Unlike some bloggers (no shade), I'm not afraid to say how I actually feel because I don't take fashion so seriously. It's meant to be enjoyable people! If you're easily 'offended' then take a valium first before reading...

Dress Comfortably

Maybe I'm just a lame for saying this but I am NOT someone who will try and kill myself to look good for LFW. Yes naturally I want to be stylish but wearing 6-inch stiletto heels and a restricted dress is probably not the way to go. Maybe you can pull it off if you're literally getting an Uber to one show and an Uber back home but if you've got a lot lined up for the day you might want to consider toning it down a noch. 



If you insist on wearing huge heels you better act like the next Giselle ready to walk down the runway because it's not cute turning up and complaining 24/7. Just saying.

Dress in Alignment With Your Aesthetic 

I have seen SO many bloggers dress ridiculously for LFW in order to get 'papped'. Everyone and their mother knows this exists because you'll see the same individual the next day and they're dressed completely differently. 



Now I know this may offend some people because sure, it's LFW why not go all out right? I just feel like people try way too hard sometimes. If you don't usually dye your hair cotton-candy pink, wear tattered double denim, studded 12-inch platforms and carry a watermelon as a clutch then don't do it now all of a sudden. 

Prepare for Bitchiness

I'm not saying everyone attending LFW is a bitch. Far from it! There are amazingly lovely people in the press/blogging world and if you are lucky enough to find these people then kudos because your experience will go up a few notches. Saying this though, there are many girls who get invited to these shows and think that they are SO boujis with their freaking Céline micro luggage tote and black floppy hat. If this is your aesthetic then I'm sorry and if you can rock it great but there's literally no need to act like your shit doesn't stink. 

I remember last year I was queuing up for a show (which I will not name) because I had gotten sent a provisional invite from a PR company who usually distributes about 18291819 more tickets than they have capacity for. So anyway I was pretty excited but I arrived late so I was right at the back of the line. Bear in mind this day was freezing cold and it kept raining intermittently. I had just arrived from a previous presentation and I honestly couldn't bring myself to stand there for God knows how long just to possibly be turned away or be squished right at the back if and when I did get entry. So I called up my friend in the line and I had said something to the effect of 'This is ridiculous, I'm not waiting around, this is crap'. Now, these two girls in front of me turned around with such death stares I felt their anger penetrate into my soul. 


Literally them.
Honest to God I thought I was going to have a full-blown fight with them in this line the way they had just eavesdropped and thought it was cool to stare me down like that. Like honey, fix your face because it's looking more chopped and screwed than a PartyNextDoor remix. Is it really that deep?! I wasn't even talking about the designer being 'crap', that'd be disrespectful. I just don't understand why people take all this stuff so damn seriously. It's just a fashion show... 

Prepare for After-Party Snobbery 

I only went to a couple after-parties last season but from what I saw at one of them, there is a lot of shadiness going on especially when it comes to the people at the door. Even if you've got an invite, you'll be judged thoroughly on your dress sense before you're allowed in (unless you're on a reality show... then you'll get a free pass). 

Some of the up-and-coming designer's after-parties are super chill but there will be a few that will be 'super exclusive' held in Mayfair locations with people desperate to get in for the free champagne and mingling opportunities with the C-list celebs. 

I got into one of these after-parties last season... I guess my outfit met their 'standards'... a couple of my blogger pals got turned away which I thought was terribly rude but I proceeded anyway...




Once I entered it was a bit of a ratchet hot mess! I mean it was fun and I enjoyed myself but all the champagne ran out and I wasn't surprised after I saw stylists, journalists and bloggers twerking in Louboutins on the dancefloor and whacking their Chanel flap-bags all over the gaff. Some of these things just aren't all they're cracked up to be for the level of snobbiness you have to endure...